louisiana wed-diiii-iiing bells

any amateur or semi-pro musician who's done a wedding can relate to my friend emily's post about the wackiness that may ensue.

why are weddings a big show? like a vegas production or something, with flashy costumes and rented animals? why are musicians treated like trick elephants? why does the artist succumb to the ch-ching sound that the fee makes, the jingling in the pocket, the sound of sacrificing almost everything artistic to the servitude of being a paid hired hand? everyone who's ever done it agrees. it's weird, selling your self to "art" (if you can hear that as a verb) at someone's party and then not even being able to be your arty self because they own you for that paid time.

the question remains yet to be answered for me. if i were ever to ask a musician friend to play at my wedding, would they feel it to be an honor or a pain in the behind? don't i want my friend to feel free to celebrate with me and share in the joy of the day? do i really want my friend to feel anxious about performing and be distracted from the happiness of the occasion? but shouldn't i allow my friend to have the opportunity to feel that he/she is blessing me with a gift of beautiful music? right now if i ever get married i think canned music is the way to go. my brother had a computer hooked up to speakers at his wedding reception. it looked hokey, sure, but it's genius really. mp3's won't show up late, don't demand anything in return, and they don't make mistakes.

here's another one. i am a young doctor, a future pillar of the community, devoting my life to the well-being of others and to the promotion of all that is healthy and right and good. i am also a musician--specifically (currently) a jazz vocalist. if i go out and sing jazz in a smoky bar, in my sultry alto ballad-voice, in my little blue dress that shows my shoulders and legs, am i compromising my medical professional credibility? if i get hired for a jazz gig, is it a step down from "pillar of the community" status to that of hired help?

as to the last question, i think "status" is made up and stupid, and who cares. still the fact remains that image and reputation have an impact on certain things and relationships. the one i care about is the patient (and pt's family) to doctor relationship. i want very much for my patients' parents to feel confident in my ability to care for their child, and to respect my teaching and instructions. that is important in optimizing their continuing medical care and health maintenance, the part that happens at home, which is becoming more and more important in this world of "treat'em and street'em" medicine. so i don't want that relationship to be undermined by my personal artistic pursuits.

and yes, emily, i do remain traumatized by that horrible wedding bells song. it lingers like a bad odor.